In The Immortal Words Of Roger Murtaugh


In The Immortal Words Of Roger Murtaugh…

In The Immortal Words Of Roger Murtaugh

I write that in jest, because you’ll never hear me utter those words. I firmly believe you’re only as old as you feel and I refuse to become that person. Still, there’s a reason for beginning the post this way. That reason? Dyshidrotic eczema. According to some sources, this primarily affects younger people, but can appear in people over 40. Ok, so I fit that description, hence the “In the immortal words of Roger Murtaugh, I’m too old for this shit.”

Just over a week ago I had three dogs and my brother and sister-in-law in my home. After everyone left, I started seeing these little bumps on my hands. I ran down a mental checklist of what might be the issue. Allergic reaction? Nope, I’m allergic to cats, but have never had any trouble with dogs. Fleas? Nope, all the dogs had been treated less than two weeks prior. Some other insect-related issue? Nope, my house had a treatment back in June. Poison ivy/poison oak? Nope, none of that on the property and if I’d encountered it while playing disc golf, it would be much more prevalent across my body. I Googled the symptoms and there were several possibilities. Fantastic! Sense the tone.

No one would ever accuse me of being a hypochondriac, but I admit this had me so confounded that I called for a doctor’s appointment last Friday morning. Fortunately, one of the doctors at the Meritas Clinic was able to see me that afternoon. I won’t give his name, but he’s a younger doctor who is new to the clinic. I don’t generally like seeing a new doctor, but mine was booked solid for weeks and I was quite concerned. Anyway, I really hope there was more analysis happening before he entered the room because, when he showed me his laptop screen, he was on Google looking at the same things I had. That didn’t instill confidence in me.

So what was his remedy? Take lukewarm showers at night. Avoid stress and the combination of heat, sun, and sweat as that exacerbates the condition. Great, summer in Kansas City makes it easy to avoid heat and sun. Oh, except that I still have to go to work. Oh, and it’s been in the mid to upper 90s if not over 100 since that appointment. Additionally, I have to use a steroid cream on my hands and thick, slimy-feeling Eucerin everywhere else in order to keep my skin moisturized. My desk and chair arms look like a slug has been crawling all over them.

Fortunately, I’m not contagious and the condition is supposed to clear up within 2-3 weeks. Until then, I’m doing my best to exercise restraint and not scratch. It’s quite maddening since EVERYTHING ITCHES!

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